Get Up!!! Get Up!!

“Sometimes life knocks you on your ass... get up, get up, get up!!! Happiness is not the absence of problems, it's the ability to deal with them.” 
― Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free

This is officially my first blog and the beginning of writing and inspiring women to take affirmative action towards happiness and being who you were meant to be.  Lets start at the beginning.
I think most of us look at others for our own value.  If we have a successful marriage, if our kids go on to be successful adults, if we have amazing relationships with our parents and siblings, then we have things to fall back on when we hit rock bottom.  But what if we have none of those? What if you have to move and you lose your friend base too?  
There have been times in my life when I have felt truly alone.  Both of my parents were young when they died. My mother died when I was 9.  I have no true siblings.  When I divorced Sean, I left the only comfort I had into a realm of the unknown without any backup plan.  I saw it as a big leap into unlimited possibilities, but the reality was more about struggling alone.  Looking back over the past 14 years since our separation, it was filled with times of weekends and holidays alone when it wasn't my turn with the boys, long horrific fights with boyfriends which left me feeling empty, and eventually moving away from the place where my kids go to school because I could no longer afford to live close to them .
Somehow, through this all, I have managed to thrive and learn more about myself.  I have learned that sometimes I am the only one who can save myself.  I have looked forward to "date nights with myself" because I know they are going to be awesome.  The beginning of my date, I go out and buy myself roses.  Then I get dressed up, and head to my favorite theater, an adult dine in theater in Marina Del Rey.  On the way, I play my favorite songs on my Spotify playlists (no ads if you pay for premium).  I order a martini, have popcorn in a porcelain bowl, and recline in a leather seat and watch a movie. This date is foolproof because I won't miss conversation or sharing a sunset with someone.    I know exactly what I like, where I like to go, what music I like to listen to, and what exercise class makes me feel sexy as soon as I walk in the door.  I also discovered what online dating site worked for me, what diet helped me, what my favorite dessert is, what anti-aging cream makes me look younger, and what it took to get my sexy back. I've also learned how to stay informed on political issues and keeping abreast of world news and also continuing my professional education with limited time constraints.  I think all these things are important to women who are venturing out into the world after leaving a relationship.  
I also believe that a support group is vital.  Even though there were many tears and complaints along the way, the most important element of discourse is encouragement for positive action.  My friends listened to my complaints, but they also encouraged me to move onward.  I have learned not to hate, but forgive.  I have a friendly relationship with my ex, thanks to advice and encouragement from my friends.  I believe this was essential in keeping the stress level down for my kids and also keeping me healthy.  
With this all said, the rest of my blogs will be about encouragement in one of these areas.  I know that single women are busy struggling and juggling careers and families and our time is limited and precious. I will keep my blogs succinct and  hope that it will inspire you to encompass all that it takes to make you happy, healthy and thrive.